Nemo Sibi Vivat

As usual, this post must begin with an apology for both its rarity and for the idiosyncrasy of its subject matter. To the latter, I plead nolo contendere (like I have for all of my speeding tickets) but hold that as the effort of its production is mine, the topic must be readily at hand in order to produce it. Therefore, whatever randomness that may be observed is merely reflective of whatever may be tumbling through my mind upon any given moment-though I confess the blog is usually a distillation of many thoughts bouncing and rattling around within my head for at least a week or two and therefore it could be seen as an honest attempt at mental organization in blog form.

To the former, my best excuse may be better encapsulated by the indispensable Dr. Samuel Johnson writing to his future biographer and good friend James Boswell, Esq. on January 10th, 1776 explaining his own lapse of more frequent correspondence.

"Why I did not dispatch so short a perusal sooner, when I look back, I am utterly

unable to discover: but human moments are stolen away by a thousand petty

impediments which leave no trace behind them."

The busy Christmas season. My growing family and the necessary (but lovely and tender) tasks of love that are attached therein. The constant duty of gainful employment (beyond the several hundred dollars a year I earn with my pen). The desire to maintain deep and meaningful relationships with family and friends. All of these pull me away from my writing but I do not resist. We all must form and nourish this important web of personal connections in order to thrive within and be an effective part of the world. They are no weight to the soul but rather they act like a buoy-propping it up with their reciprocal love and care without which life is hard, cold and lonely.

However, I suppose it is, as Johnson alludes to, the smaller things that wear us down, that we instantly forget about and that truly contribute to my periodic absences from the blogosphere. After all, who, for instance, can remember paying October 2015's cable bill? And yet, it happened and left "no trace behind". These things too are necessary but they also steal that most precious of gifts from us which is irreplaceable-time. The holiday season, as it rushes in, whirls about and flees like a dream in the morning, seems like regular life wound up and released at double speed. All of a sudden we are singing Auld Lang Syne and another entire calendar year has seemingly swept on by. I find this is always a great time to stop and breathe and reflect upon things. Of late, I find myself considering friendship.

Growing up my family watched "It's A Wonderful Life" every year around Christmas. I readily admit that I love that movie and know almost the whole thing word for word. I am certain my parents and siblings do as well. At the end of that movie, Clarence (the angel sent to Earth to show George Bailey how things would be for his community if he had not lived) sends George a note that says "Remember George: no man is a failure who has friends." By showing George his own importance through the effect his life had on his friends and family he allows George to truly recognize what a wonderful life he has in fact lived.

Hence the title of this blog post. "Let no man live for himself." The latin word "nemo" means "no man", as in Captain Nemo in Verne's Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea. The captain has abandoned humanity to live in the Nautilus underneath the waves. He is a tragic character in the sense that he has willfully given up his humanity by giving up his relationship to the world. He is truly "nemo" for he is truly disconnected.

And of course, it is our friends and family, our connections to them and they to us, that ultimately impart meaning into our lives. As Aristotle writes in his Politics, any man who lives in solitude is "either a beast or a God." I am confident that we are not Gods. My enduring hope and belief in the intrinsic dignity of humanity suggests that we are superior to the beasts in the field and the birds in the air. It seems that we are halfway between the two and the choice is ours with regard to which of these two we more resemble. The careful development of friendships, cultivated over time, sometimes requiring a puff of air to catch the cooling embers alight again and sometimes requiring a tincture of time to allow the roaring fire to abate a touch, is one of those poignant choices that lead me to think we can pull ourselves up a little higher into the rarefied atmosphere and a little further away from the Earth. Our friendships, in a sense both elevate us and also help to define us. These myriad elegant tendrils of love collected over the course of a lifetime create a complex system of interconnectedness and it is these relationships that move the world.

So let's raise a glass to our friends, past, present and future, as the new year comes and ushers in another billion tiny choices representing the detritus of life that we must attend to. For our friends pull us up and above all that, as we pull them up simultaneously, and give us a small taste of the sacred even if we must keep one foot in the muddy profane world of the everyday. And if there's one or two that this post makes you think of-go ahead and give them a call. I suspect they, like George Bailey, will rejoice in remembering what your friendship means to them, and by extension, what they mean to you.

In book news, all formatting and editing is done. I expect to get a book on Amazon and in e-book form over the next week (maybe two at the most). Now of course comes the hard part for me...marketing! If you'd like a copy or want to reach out to me for any other reason, please do so. I love to hear from old friends.

Finally, see below for the new book cover! I think it's fantastic and the fine people at Palmetto Publishing in Charleston, SC are, as always, doing an incredible job! I'll write again soon when the book is out and all seven of you may run out and get a copy! And before I forget, a happy and flourishing new year to you all!